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Writer's picturemusingsmiddleagedmom

College Journey - the SAT

Have you ever wondered how applying to college seems to be a more personal journey for you rather than your children?

Allow me to explain - my oldest daughter is getting ready for college (read applications are in process as we speak) and I am the one that has chewed out all my nails, have sleepless nights while my dearest sleeps soundly. HOW!?!

Here is a window into some of the conversations that have taken place in our house over the SAT....

Phase 1. The SAT/ACT - those bloody dreaded exams. I think they have given me more heartburn than my child. Right after the PSAT....when the scores are in the toilet.

Me: "Honey, I think we are going to need a little bit of help with getting ready for the SAT, what do you think?"

Daughter: "Why do you think so, mom? It's only my PSAT I am not supposed to prepare for this round, this is my baseline. Now I will start my preparation process."

Me wringing my hands in dismay ready to slap myself to keep calm. "Honey, you will need a lot more than just grit and hardwork to bring this to where good universities will accept you."

Daughter: "Naah, scores are optional at most universities."

Me chewing my lips to not scream out "Are you nuts!! Don't you get it!!" Instead, I say "But darling, the fact that some really need it, don't you think we should prepare?"

After a lot of back and forth and assistance from her counselor we finally get it into her that she atleast needs to prepare for the SATs. $5K for some preppy crash course and more chasing down to take it seriously.... we prepare.

Phase 2: The tests themselves - the week before the test

Me: "Honey, don't you think you should go over everything you have learnt given the test is not far away?"

Daughter: "Why mom, I have spent so much time preparing already. Besides I have homework and then some random kid's birthday dinner to attend."

Me: "Right darling, but don't you think this is a tad bit more important."

Daughter: "Mom, it's my weekend and exams just got over, I am beat I am not planning to work today, I will schedule my time."

Mom fuming at this stage because she did work her ass off for her exams, goes back into her hole to fret in private.

Finally, the test takes place and the scores are much better, but not where mom wants them.

Me: "Honey, don't you think we should try and take it one more time."

Daughter: "Mom, I don't understand why this is such a big deal for you."

Me: "Well, with super scoring and all that jazz......"

Daughter: "Mom, tests are optional at most of the colleges I am applying to. Will you please stop."

Me: "Honey, when you submit your score doesn't that increase your chances of getting in?"

Daughter: "MOM! CA is test blind!!!!!!"

Me (ready to jump out the window) thinking to myself.... but we don't live in CA and there are a lot of great colleges in our state and on the east coast that you are applying to. However, I say out loud "Well, we need to keep our options open. There are 49 other states in the US."

Daughter now visibly annoyed as I won't let go of the topic: "Mom, I need to focus on my grades and my social life too I will not be meeting a lot of these friends once I move away."

Me popping an antacid: "Yes, dear"

With a lot of negotiation, irritation and huffing and puffing on both sides we decide we need to take more tests. Rinse, lather repeat and months later.....

Scores are yet not where I want them (OfCourse mom wants nothing less than 1500), but my daughter is happy with them.

Phase 3. Final submissions

Daughter comes to me all excited after the third: "My last SAT was my best mom. I am so happy with it."

Me: "That's awesome honey, so you will be submitting these scores to the colleges, right?"

Daughter: "Oh, the colleges that I really want to get into, I am applying EA in October, these scores won't come out till later."

Me using my daughter's tone "What do you meaannnnnnnnnnnnn" All this effort for nothing?!

Daughter her volume higher than mine: "I told you mom!"

We stare at each other for five minutes each wondering who won this argument.



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